used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
