Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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