singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Its about making memories worth repressing
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
