So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
