8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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