Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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