Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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