What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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