bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
My hand turned me down
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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