Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
