you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
foreskin is a definite game changer
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
