Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
