It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize
