Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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