Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
