Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
