i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
