you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
