worst night to have a conscience
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
