come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
