I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
