Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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