His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
