Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
handjob tips. give me some.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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