Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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