I'm jealous of your bromance
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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