Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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