THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize