32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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