hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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