My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
