9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
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screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
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I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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