I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
