He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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