Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?

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(207): I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal? http://tfl.nu/y7ty

Replies (9) Good night (736) Bad night (821)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I chose taco bell over sex...

(503): View more from Oregon

good choice.

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(503): I chose taco bell over sex... (503): good choice. http://tfl.nu/85cg

Replies (16) Good night (2326) Bad night (1048)
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(972): View more from Texas

Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose

(214): View more from Texas

962=my?

(972): View more from Texas

Yeah.i

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(972): Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose (214): 962=my? (972): Yeah.i http://tfl.nu/5itb

Replies (12) Good night (2846) Bad night (877)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?

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(205): Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in? http://tfl.nu/qt1z

Replies (15) Good night (5335) Bad night (937)
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(289): View more from Ontario

So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already

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(289): So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already http://tfl.nu/wb0t

Replies (24) Good night (7794) Bad night (1410)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.

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(202): Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now. http://tfl.nu/6prd

Replies (7) Good night (1011) Bad night (2559)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.

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(860): i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm. http://tfl.nu/uzjb

Replies (20) Good night (4093) Bad night (1275)
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(512): View more from Texas

You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.

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(512): You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you. http://tfl.nu/zer9

Replies (16) Good night (3284) Bad night (739)
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(770): View more from Georgia

He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?

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(770): He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude? http://tfl.nu/vcqn

Replies (8) Good night (654) Bad night (2486)
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(+61): View more from Australia

And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?

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(+61): And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up? http://tfl.nu/g9ke

Replies (19) Good night (762) Bad night (1832)
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(515): View more from Iowa

P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready

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(515): P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready http://tfl.nu/rgh6

Replies (15) Good night (1783) Bad night (1370)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.

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(856): I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help. http://tfl.nu/4hfj

Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (1463)
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(207): View more from Maine

He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.

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(207): He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug. http://tfl.nu/cbeo

Replies (7) Good night (1113) Bad night (1170)
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(204): View more from Manitoba

I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am

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(204): I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am http://tfl.nu/cxx7

Replies (5) Good night (974) Bad night (511)
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(650): View more from California

Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah

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(650): Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah http://tfl.nu/cx0s

Replies (2) Good night (429) Bad night (437)

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