Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
