I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
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I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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