I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
