she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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