Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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