I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize