SEEEEXXX PLEASE
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
