Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
