love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
