I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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