I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
