Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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