i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
