paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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