would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
