he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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